But why!?
Okay. I know this is a big shock to a lot of people. I got into Heroes of the Storm in the first weeks of its technical alpha. In that time, I accumulated over 5,000 games played. At an average of 20 minutes each, that's 100,000 minutes, or 1,666+ hours. That's the most time I've ever sunk into a video game (Mind you that isn't including all the queue times, drafts, etc! Add an extra 5 mins on to every game for that!)
Before I got into streaming, I never stuck to any single game for long. I would log in to League of Legends, play a game or two and quit. I'd go play terraria for a couple hours after that. Then I'd watch an anime, then play some other game then sleep. I never was able to bring myself to sit and play a single game for 8 hours at a time, no matter how much I enjoyed a game.
Heroes of the Storm was different, though. I found myself playing it because Abathur was such a unique hero archetype that didn't exist in any other moba. I could play him all day and never tire of it. Even then though, before I streamed, I would maybe play 5-6 hours at a time. Then I got into streaming. This pushed me to play it 8-12 hours a day, 7 days a week, to entertain a growing audience. It was exciting. But after a period of time, I realized I wasn't really enjoying the game anymore. Not as much, anyway. Little things began to irritate me, I found myself getting salty quicker and quicker, I'd lash out.
It got to a point I literally woke up dreading having to hit the Play button. It was dragging me back into my clinical depression and making me miserable. Each time I'd stream something else, just for enjoyment, was a way to cope with that stress. But every single time I'd play anything else, I was always hammered with "Wtf dude, play HOTS! Why aren't you playing Abathur? Unfollowed!" Just stressing me even worse to go back to a game I no longer enjoyed.
Well, after climbing to Grand Master and then immediately losing roughly 10 straight games and tanking back to Diamond 1, something snapped in me. I literally couldn't do it anymore. Sure, I would hold 100~ view count playing Heroes of the Storm, but I was finding myself with more unfollows than follows anymore. Donations were next to non-existant, and I was only feeling glum when playing it. Not only that, but my daughter will be here in a matter of weeks and I won't have the time to commit to playing mobas.
So I figured, what's the point? I would rather stream with 20-40 viewers playing games I truly have fun playing, which leads to an overall better stream experience for my subscribers and new people who stumble in. I feel that if I do what makes me happy, everyone else will be happy too. I'm sorry if you decide to unfollow me and leave because I'm not playing Heroes of the Storm anymore, but honestly, I really only care about those who care about ME. Not the game. The people who are friends and like family, who come to each and every stream and make jokes and tease and have fun regardless of what I play. They are who matter, and they are who I'm going to continue to work hard to make happy.
And I hope you're one of those people.
Love you lots.
- Abathur.
Before I got into streaming, I never stuck to any single game for long. I would log in to League of Legends, play a game or two and quit. I'd go play terraria for a couple hours after that. Then I'd watch an anime, then play some other game then sleep. I never was able to bring myself to sit and play a single game for 8 hours at a time, no matter how much I enjoyed a game.
Heroes of the Storm was different, though. I found myself playing it because Abathur was such a unique hero archetype that didn't exist in any other moba. I could play him all day and never tire of it. Even then though, before I streamed, I would maybe play 5-6 hours at a time. Then I got into streaming. This pushed me to play it 8-12 hours a day, 7 days a week, to entertain a growing audience. It was exciting. But after a period of time, I realized I wasn't really enjoying the game anymore. Not as much, anyway. Little things began to irritate me, I found myself getting salty quicker and quicker, I'd lash out.
It got to a point I literally woke up dreading having to hit the Play button. It was dragging me back into my clinical depression and making me miserable. Each time I'd stream something else, just for enjoyment, was a way to cope with that stress. But every single time I'd play anything else, I was always hammered with "Wtf dude, play HOTS! Why aren't you playing Abathur? Unfollowed!" Just stressing me even worse to go back to a game I no longer enjoyed.
Well, after climbing to Grand Master and then immediately losing roughly 10 straight games and tanking back to Diamond 1, something snapped in me. I literally couldn't do it anymore. Sure, I would hold 100~ view count playing Heroes of the Storm, but I was finding myself with more unfollows than follows anymore. Donations were next to non-existant, and I was only feeling glum when playing it. Not only that, but my daughter will be here in a matter of weeks and I won't have the time to commit to playing mobas.
So I figured, what's the point? I would rather stream with 20-40 viewers playing games I truly have fun playing, which leads to an overall better stream experience for my subscribers and new people who stumble in. I feel that if I do what makes me happy, everyone else will be happy too. I'm sorry if you decide to unfollow me and leave because I'm not playing Heroes of the Storm anymore, but honestly, I really only care about those who care about ME. Not the game. The people who are friends and like family, who come to each and every stream and make jokes and tease and have fun regardless of what I play. They are who matter, and they are who I'm going to continue to work hard to make happy.
And I hope you're one of those people.
Love you lots.
- Abathur.